A mind that feels tortured

I think the reason I'm running out of energy is that so much of it is spent chasing every word and every action, everything said or done, by others and by myself. Trying to make sense of things that don't make sense.

Running after every detail, while carrying a body that aches, pain in my legs, my back, a constant heaviness, and a mind that feels tortured, leaves a person feeling hopeless. Not because hope is gone, but because it's buried somewhere unreachable, hidden ina place no human knows how to find. Hope is there, just out of reach.

The patients I see suffering from psychological distress are not so different. They are vulnerable people who were once surviving, just like everyone else, until something broke. At some point, they could no longer cope, and their hearts and minds began to collapse.

Our hearts are carrying the weight of countless massacres, of living through an endless genocide. Our minds keep us going, but in doing so, they take us far away from ourselves.