i didn't know how many humans I have saved

I don't know how many humans I have saved. And I don't know how many others I should have saved.

But all l know is this: from the moment I became aware of other people's pain, my only purpose in life has been to lessen it, by as much as I can.

There are many things I don't know about myself. I don't even know if I can survive in this world.

But, I know that I am seen as that suffering human being, someone people perceive as dark, and lifeless, while they pass over my pain very quickly, without giving me even a moment of their feelings, or their awareness. And I know a lot about my enemy. I know they are afraid and overwhelmed by me. I know they killed my friend's wife and son, and left his innocent daughter to a lifetime of suffering, because they are criminal cowards.

I know they sniped my uncle, Dr. Saeed, in the head because they did not want him to save lives, because they never wanted for any Palestinian to have a life.

I know it is a genocide, because they killed nearly a hundred from my family, a hundred from my friend's family, a hundred from my neighbor's family, and thousands, and hundreds of thousands of my people. And still.

I know they erased my homeland simply because they are a brutal occupation, who sings for total destruction.

I know that many Arab leaders and nations are not my brothers and sisters, but supporters of my enemy, supporters of starvation and the killing of children by every method imaginable.

I know that much of the world is comfortable ignoring our misery, because they have grown used to it. Because it has become boring to them.

I know there are psychopaths and criminals who rise to power, who issue orders like false gods, demanding that things be done, or else unleashing hell.

But I also know you.

I know there are good people around the world who have spent their lives fighting to preserve their humanity, to ease pain, protect dignity, and offer comfort and kindness to those around them. You are the ones who have kept us alive for this long. You are the ones who have helped me bring warmth to thousands of cold children in my camp.